Brooklyn BDSM dungeon owner accuses angry neighbor of ‘kink shaming’

The Taillor group, an intersectional BDSM collective, is being forced to move out of their Bed-Stuy neighborhood

The owner of a BDSM club in the Bedford-Stuyvesant area of Brooklyn is feuding with her neighbor.

What happened?

The Taillor Group, owned by Charlotte Taillor, is a feminist kink and fetish space that also offers free self-defense classes. They opened in the Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhood back in January. However, due to pressure from religious neighbors, The Taillor Group is currently raising money to move to a new location.

‘We are being terribly harassed and kink shamed by a (very religious) neighbor at our newest space and we need to run away and relocate as soon as possible,’ a pop-up on their website reads.

News of The Taillor Group’s opening was first reported when flyers distributed misidentified the space as a ‘gentlemen’s club’ and urged residents to complain to the community board as well as the local police department.

‘No, we’re a kink space, we’re a feminist collective,’ Charlotte Taillor told Gothamist. ‘We don’t even call men gentlemen here… they’re on their knees.’

According to Gothamist, the Department of Buildings has received several complaints about the space since it opened.

On 9 February, Tallior attended the local block association meeting in an attempt to make amends and seek compromise. However, the religious neighbor didn’t want to hear it.

‘We tried so hard to respect her block, be nice to her block,’ Taillor explained to Gothamist. ‘[The neighbor] just wants us to leave, which I want to. I have no interest in being at a place where we’re not cherished, you know?’

The Notes

Taillor has since set up a fundraising page to help with moving costs. But things quickly escalated after Taillor put a note on her neighbor’s door informing her of the upcoming move.

‘We have no intentions of remaining on the block if our stay is creating problems for you or anyone else,’ the note, attained by Gothamist, reads. ‘We are going to move.’

‘Please stop harassing us – we are currently arranging the move and any time we spend handling harassment only slows that process down.’

‘In order to work on the move, we need you to stop engaging in the activities you have been doing, including: please stop harassing people as they enter and exit our apartment and other on the street. Please stop recording us or taking our picture. Please stop filing complaints. Please stop going through our garbage. Please stop circulating flyers.’

‘We feel attacked and unsafe,’ Taillor stated, before including the number to her attorney.

The neighbor replied with her own note, telling Taillor to ‘never come on [their] property again.’

The neighbor refuted each claim in Taillor’s letter, claiming they wanted ‘nothing to do’ with Taillor or her clients.

‘It’s been terrifying,’ Taillor told Patch. ‘Everyone has cried over this.’ She mentioned that many of her employees have been scared away by the harassment and threats.

The Meeting

On 6 March, members of a block association at Quincy Street in Bedford-Stuyvesant met in the basement of Macedonia Church of Christ to voice their concerns. Taillor, accompanied by her lawyer, attended the meeting and pleaded with the group to stop their complaints. She mentioned that it cost her $100,000 [€88,972] to move to the block in January and as a ‘mom and pop’ business, they don’t have the funds to relocate immediately.

The main concern many residents voiced was the fact Taillor was operating a business on a residential block.

The Neighbor

Laurie Miller, the religious neighbor living next door to Taillor, called the meeting.

‘If it was a meth lab I’d be just as upset,’ Miller told Gothamist. ‘Because bringing these transient, nefarious-looking guys into the community that aren’t part of the community but coming in to do whatever they want to do and then bounce? They have no vested interest in the quality of life in this community.’

‘She’s against everything we are, from queer to kink to sex-positive and body-positive,’ Taillor said of Miller. ‘And the whole sexual liberation movement? She is not down with it.’

See Also:

Iceland is sending a queer BDSM band to Eurovision

Doctor Who star Matt Smith defends new film role as gay BDSM photographer

UK government will relax rules and allow bondage and fetish porn

Australia launches first LGBTI consent festival

Author: Rafaella Gunz

The post Brooklyn BDSM dungeon owner accuses angry neighbor of ‘kink shaming’ appeared first on Gay Star News.

18 Year-Old Murdered 53 Year-Old Man During Rough Role-Play ‘Game’

Here’s what we know from the the Greater Manchester Police Department: Daniel Kurmelovs, who is 18, met 53 year-old Frank Lennon at at Manchester’s Gay Village last summer.

A Manchester jury heard evidence in the case that commenced on January 21st, that Lennon had asked Kurmelovs to strangle him for “masochistic pleasure,” the Manchester Evening News reports.

Kurmelovs claims that it went too far and he accidentally murdered him.

Police have constructed a counter-narrative based primarily on Facebook posts and the fact that Kurmelovs was found with £900 in cash, watches, jewelery, and hundreds of cigarettes identified as being Lennon’s property.

Kurmelovs, said police, squirted Lennon’s body with cleaning products–before shaving his head and posed in front of a mirror during a trip to London, where he boasted of having a “sick night.”

Kurmelovs was arrested an hour later on suspicion of murder after confessing to his crimes, telling a woman he had “killed someone” for cigarettes.

Two days later he was charged with Mr. Lennon’s murder.

Following his trial last week, Kurmelovs confessed to manslaughter maintaining his claim that the death was an accident.

A jury convicted him of murder after less than an hour of deliberations.

The post 18 Year-Old Murdered 53 Year-Old Man During Rough Role-Play ‘Game’ appeared first on Towleroad Gay News.

The four ways I knew that my kinky relationship had become abusive

BDSM scene posed by model | Photo: Dream Boy Bondage

How do you know when a kinky relationship becomes abusive? One domestic abuse survivor reveals what happened to him: 

When I was younger, I always loved getting tied up by a friend.

It started as boys rough-housing. And then, one day, my best friend got a skipping rope and tied my arms behind my back.

It turned me on, feeling both helpless and fighting against the strain.

We did it more. Somewhere along the line, it became him trying out new ways of tying me up.

It awakened something in me, something that would change how I would forever see sex, relationships and submission.

I think I masturbated to bondage and fetish gay porn even before I knew what vanilla sex was.

It didn’t matter if it was a man or woman doing the domination, it just mattered that a man was submitting and feeling powerless.

I couldn’t help but want to be the same; a slave in service to a master.

The four ways I knew that my kinky relationship had become abusive 

Man in kink leather gear at gay pride

Photo: torbakhopper / Flickr

As I went through various time-wasters and fantasists in my early 20s, I finally met a man that felt different. I was 25. He was 20 years older, he was strict, he was in charge, and I immediately fell for him hard.

Each message from him online sent a stir down inside. Each picture I sent of my body in submissive poses would make me want to cum. I had to meet him.

The first time we met, we had an instant connection. When he tied me up and fucked me, I felt cared for. Domination felt like an embrace.

For the next month or so, we played almost every day. It was like a secret, knowing that I belonged to someone else. I walked in the world as a free man but I knew deep down I was a slave.

And then he offered to take it further: a 24/7 bondage relationship. It had come at the right time. I had just been fired from my job, and I had no idea what I was going to do or where to live next.

He offered to take care of me, look after me, in return for 24/7 submission. How could I refuse?

1 He didn’t trust me

One of the first things he did was put a tracker on my phone. He could track where my phone was at any time. So if he told me to go to food shopping, he would look to see if I went anywhere else. If I did, I would be punished.

His jealousy was also something else.

At first I loved being his ‘model’ on Recon. He would demonstrate his rope technique on me in a bid to welcome other boys in his dungeon.

But then we’d get messages asking to ‘use’ the boy in the photos. He would accuse me of being a ‘slut’ and a ‘whore’. The words were coming out of anger.

If we were out at a club, he would punish me for flirting – even if I was just speaking to another guy. Punishment became his favorite way of exercising his jealousy.

2 He didn’t respect my limits

And then there was the punishment. When we first met, starting to engage in a kinky relationship, I said a hard limit was watersports. I never wanted to get peed on. It’s fine if you like it, but it wasn’t for me.

It became one of his favorite punishments for me, especially because he knew I didn’t like it.

I told him, several times, that I didn’t want to do it. And then, afterwards, he said he had been ‘caught up in the moment’.

3 He isolated me from friends and family

Becoming a 24/7 ‘slave’ was exhausting. He would wait for me to make plans with friends and then force me to cancel on them at the last minute.

This one time, a long-time friend was having his birthday. As I was getting ready to leave, he told me I wasn’t allowed to leave. I had to have sex with him instead.

Why didn’t I just go anyway? Why didn’t I fight back? I wish I had. But he kept saying I would have nowhere to live without him.

People stopped calling. I stopped getting invited to things. I thought no one cared and he was right. He was the only one I had left.

4 He thought he knew what was ‘best’ for me

That’s the one thing I remember he always said: he knew what was ‘best’.

He said he knew what was best for me emotionally, physically, sexually. But for that year, I was trapped. Trapped in a turn on that had turned toxic.

I remember, one day, a friend reached out. They asked, ‘Are you OK? I’m worried about you.’

And I just stopped. No one had asked me that, a genuine question of concern, in a long time. I said no, I wasn’t. And we kept on talking.

It’s been three years since then. Taking myself out of that situation was so hard. I realize I had been manipulated at a time when I was at my lowest point. And because I was looking for help, and affection, in any form it took, I took it where I could find it.

It was a long time before I engaged in kink again. It took some therapy and reconnecting with friends, but I think I’m OK again.

I’ve even ventured back out there on the dating scene. And in the kinky world, I’ve come to realize there are definitely guys that believe in consent and respect. I can’t wait to meet the one that’s right for me.

Need help?

If you are experiencing any signs of domestic abuse, remember – you’re not alone.

Are you in the US? Contact The Anti-Violence Project hotline: 1-212-714-1141.

Are you in the UK? Contact Galop, who run the National LGBT Domestic Abuse Helpline: 0800 999 5428

Or see our list of global support services for LGBTI people, in alphabetical order.

If you want to share your story of domestic abuse, please contact James Besanvalle or Joe Morgan.

Author: GSN Contributor

The post The four ways I knew that my kinky relationship had become abusive appeared first on Gay Star News.